MUVA MODE
* pronounced muh-vah : Slang for Mother*
*swipe for more pictures*
They say college is where you meet your lifelong friends, and boy oh boy is that true! Five years ago I meet Tarré and we’ve been inseparable ever since! Throughout the past couple of years, we have both experienced numerous challenges (and of course victories) but through it all she has remained my right hand woman as well as my voice of reason. She has unintentionally taught me to unapologetically be a goal digger, no matter how big or small the goal may seem …if she said she would do it, best believe she did it! When I asked numerous people to describe Tarré using one word Focused, Fierce, Blunt, Responsible, Knowledgeable and Strong were the reoccurring adjectives that were given to me, and I completely agree!
When Tarré told me she was expecting my heart was filled with so much joy…of course I cried and of course she called me soft lol! I am so proud of the woman she has become and I know the little girl growing inside her will immediately see what the world sees in her marvelous muva!
Pregnancy
How would you explain you sense of style? How has that changed throughout your pregnancy?
I would describe my sense of style as girly and glamorous. Heels and accessories are my favorite other than sneakers and Uggs I don't really own flats. I think the shoes and the accessories can take a simple outfit and make it 10 times better. Pregnancy hasn't really changed my style. I HATE maternity clothes, they are all drab and bland...the complete opposite of me. I still shop at my favorite stores I just buy larger sizes to fit over my belly! When I first started showing I struggled to get dressed in something other than sweats. My body was changing and I wasn't really feeling like myself. Your body changes so much so rapidly and you can't control it. For me I just had to get up and get fully dressed, a nice outfit, heels, and a full beat. I had to force myself to get back to "normal" and not let the early stages of pregnancy and how I physically felt take over. I truly believe that when you look good you feel good!
What’s your favorite food to eat these days?
I have had so many different cravings first it was oldbay shrimp, then Red Hot Utz chips (I still have a secret stash just in case it comes backJ ), Ben and Jerry’s Milk and Cookies ice cream was another one. Currently I CANNOT stop eating Keebler fudge stripe cookies and cereal at one point I had 5 different types of cereal in my pantry. Grocery shopping while pregnant and hungry is dangerous!
What’s best part of being pregnant thus far?
The best part of being pregnant is getting waited on! No one tells a pregnant woman no! Anything I want I get. I recently discovered that you can pre-board flights if your pregnant…who knew! I take full advantage of that. Perks of being with child.
What is one thing you wish people really understood about a pregnant woman?
I really wish people understood that pregnancy doesn’t make you fragile. You are literally making a human being inside your body to me that is far from fragile. Sure you can’t lift heavy things or do certain activities but that doesn’t mean you have to sit inside all day long. I think Cardi B proved that to everyone at Coachella pregnancy isn’t a prison sentence. I still live an active life despite being pregnant.
Motherhood
What was the biggest parenting lesson your mother taught you that you will carry on to motherhood?
The biggest lesson my mother taught me is a hard question to answer I can’t pick just one so I’ll pick the most meaningful ones. Many of the lessons I have learned from my mom I don’t think she taught me purposely, I think I just observed them and kept them in my memory bank until I needed them. The first lesson I learned from my mom is to always put your child first. Throughout my life I have never felt like my mom didn’t put me first or do everything in her power to give me the best. I always knew she had my back and would do anything for me. The next thing is to not lose yourself just because you’re a mom. It’s okay to do things without your kids. While being the best mom my mom still enjoyed her life. My parents still take time to just be a couple and not necessarily parents. I think that is important for children to see that their parents actually love each other and that they have more in common than their child. I still plan on going on dates and vacationing without my child just to be alone with my partner. The last thing is to never lie to your children; honesty is literally the best policy. I think in order to have a strong relationship with your child you have to be willing to have open and honest conversations with them. Even if the conversation is difficult I think there is more respect and trust created when both parties are honest, especially the pare
What part of becoming a mother are you looking forward to the most?
Being a mom is a big responsibility. I am looking forward to passing along all the great life lessons I have learned along the way to my daughter. I can’t wait for the village around her to teach her things as well. Aside from the life lessons I am excited to dress her up just because and for every holiday. I can’t wait to see what type of personality she is going to have and what she’s going to look like.
What does being a good mom mean to you?
To me a good mom is someone who always puts her best foot forward and puts the welfare of the child first. I don’t think kids need parents who have a lot of money or shower them with gifts. I think all kids just wanted to be loved and protected.
How have you been preparing yourself for motherhood? Has your outlook on parenting changed thus far?
I don’t think you can really prepare to be a parent. Luckily I have younger siblings so I am not a rookie when it comes to handling small children! I will say it’s hard to know what you actually need to buy. There are so many baby items sold and so many people swear by certain things which all happen to be different. Filtering through all the suggestions and getting what I actually need has been a challenge. Plus having a girl it makes it harder, because if its cute I want to buy it regardless if she’ll use it or not. My outlook hasn’t really changed much I still think motherhood is going to be one of the most exciting and challenging times of my life but I think I’m ready for everything this next chapter of life is going to bring.
Millennial Mommies
Earlier this weak I made an Instagram post asking my followers to nominate their favorite Millennial Mom. I then asked these millennial mommies two very simple but complex questions. Question #1, What was the biggest lesson your mother taught you that you've carried into motherhood and Question #2 was, If you could give one piece of advice to another millennial mom what would it be ? Lets see what these Millennial Muvas had to say !
Ebony | 24 | @Ebb2good
A lesson that will always stick with me is to work hard for what you want, never think anything will be handed to you, when you don't it lessen the quality.
Advice I would give another millennial mother is to not allow your child/children to fall for the stereotypes. A man should know how to cook, clean and nurture just as much as a woman should know how to provide protect and prosper.
MeAsia | 27 | @ayy_slimbeauty
I have constantly seen my mother go above and beyond for the people she care about and loves (family & friends), for them not to show the same gesture in return. So I would say the Biggest lesson I will bring into motherhood is understanding what unconditional love is . Understanding that when it comes to caring about the happiness and well being of another person without any thought of what we might get for ourselves is true unconditional love . And I will continue to say “ Should my love gestures have to stop because you are unable to show how you love me ? “ I pray my child/children will appreciate the same unconditional love I was taught , as I pass it on to them.
I would advise the millennial mom , to get on the floor. Get on the floor with your child . Play with your child . Feed your child's creativity . Talk to your child while your down there. Imagine with your child. Try to make your child laugh at least 5 times a day . Don’t let technology do it for you . Remember you were once that Child.
Dani |30 | @DaniWrote / @LoversQuarrelShow
The biggest lesson my mom taught me about motherhood wasn’t in a a set discussion or pearl of wisdom. Watching her be a mother to me was the lesson in itself on how to handle motherhood. Strong yet tender, she embodies the internal fortitude it takes to be a mom.
The piece of advice I would give to another millennial mom is that this is the most exhausting, amazing thing you’ll ever do and while it may seem like the preferred method is to do it all alone, I implore you moms to use your village to help in keeping your head above water in the hard times.
Shantell | 31 | @shantelmenothn
Biggest Lesson: Children are visual learners. They don’t know or understand that if you are away you are working or trying to provide a better future for them. They just remember if mommy was there are not. Being present counts mos
Perfection does not exist. We were not sent home from the hospital with user manuals. Every day, we are trying our best to be the best possible versions of ourselves to create the best possible environment(s) for our children to grow be functional adults.
Angela | 26 | @Suchafiasco
The biggest lesson my mother taught me is that no matter the situation, God is in control and he has everything planned out. There’s no need to worry, because he has it all taken care of.
Soak in every second, every smile, every tear, every new sound, everything. Your child is the best gift you will ever receive, so cherish them!
Ashley L | 32 | @alowe03
The biggest lesson that my mother taught me is no matter what the circumstances ALWAYS be present, active and attentive to my daughter and her needs.
If I could give one piece of advice to a millennial mom, it would be....mhhhmmm that’s challenging because single moms are my heart, so I really want to pour everything that I have into them, but since I can only give one piece of advice it would have to be that we are going to have to do hard things in life and in mommyhood, your perspective on the hard things is going to determine the outcome of the situation. Choose to be positive, Choose to be optimistic; even though it will may not be the easiest, you can do it. Say it! Believe it and it will be done!
Evelyn| 29 | @Hi_Off_E
One lesson that my mom has taught me about motherhood is to always be there for my child through the good and the bad.
One piece of advice that I would give to my fellow millennial moms is to not lose yourself because your kids need you to be the best you